Bareback Cometh
The Rise and Rise of Barebacking
By Mikee dela Cruz

COMMONPLACE PRACTICE Despite the risks involved in barebacking, many MSMs continue to do it - and that's even as HIV and AIDS, as well as other STI infections are on the rise in the GLBTQI community.

SEEING DIFFERENTLY

About.com’s Johnson, of course, stresses that “none of the benefits of barebacking outweigh the chances of contracting HIV or other STDs.”  “Are there any benefits to barebacking?  Sure, there are benefits to barebacking.”  But “keep in mind the negative effects of barebacking.”

The biggest drawback of barebacking is it “dramatically increases the chances of contracting HIV and other STDs like syphilis.  Some STD's can lead to live changing conditions and eventually death. Protect yourself, even if a guy tells you he's HIV and STD negative,” Johnson says.
Of course, even if you, yourself, do not get infected, you can be the one giving the infection/s to others.  “It's never the season for giving when it comes to STDs.  If you do have an STD, you can play a great part in efforts to control viruses and diseases by playing safe.”

In the same vein, Sowadsky adds: “If you are infected with HIV or another STD, and you bareback, you can infect other people, including those you care the most about, such as your lover and your friends.”

On a more personal note, the biggest issue for me is putting my life in somebody else’s hands.  Something unnecessary, especially since, as Johnson stresses, “sometimes that other person is a stranger.  Your body is your temple.  A few moments of pleasure is not worth a lifetime of pain or suffering.”

Saying no to R. Reyes couldn’t be easier, therefore – even if, in his way of thinking, we know each other enough to “completely trust each other” and bareback.  I, definitely, beg to differ.

TAKING CAUTION

Not largely popular in the Philippines – just yet, perhaps; though still fortunately – is bug chasing, the practice of knowingly exposing oneself to STDs, particularly HIV and/or AIDS.  This, says nurse Mark Cichoki in HIV and Barebacking, also in About.com, “not just an urban myth.”  “Often called bug chasers among the gay community, these men seek out other gay men who are infected, in hopes of having unprotected sex, barebacking, in an effort to become infected with HIV.  Across the Internet, chat rooms and newsgroups are advertising ‘conversion parties,’ where negative men seek out those who are positive in hopes of getting infected.  (In fact, the) number of gay men looking to become positive seems to be growing, (so that the) Centers for Disease Control (CDC) reports a new surge in the incidence of HIV among gay males, in part due to this unthinkable practice.”

The rationale (no matter how irrational) behind bug chasing varies, from low self-esteem (the thinking that, hey, perhaps becoming positive can provide that support system) to having the worst done and over with (getting HIV and/or AIDS infection is deemed the worst that can happen to MSMs, so just have it done over with) to living on the edge (the getting of pleasure from risky activities).  At the very basic, though, the reasoning behind wanting to be positive lies on the lack of education, among others, believing that HIV and AIDS are no longer fatal (they still are), or thinking that protection becomes unnecessary if/when they already have HIV and AIDS (it still is), or assuming that they will get some form of support for being positive (in the Philippines, good luck!).

There, really, has to be more efforts to educate the public, not just MSMs, on safer sexual practices.

MAKING RULES

“You’ll like it, I promise,” R. Reyes says to me, still insisting his way of thinking.

“No.”

“Come on.”

“No.”

“Please?”

“No.”

It went like that for a while – the attempt to change my frame of mind with his insistence, and my insistence that, no, my mind is made up, and that is that.
The insistence continues, too, in Guys4Men.com’s BAKBAKAN – BAREBACKAN, where the number of those joining the thread continues to increase.  There are still those who post messages to promote safer sex practices (one even makes use of the fear of people of HIV, posting photographs of people dying from HIV and AIDS, symptoms like Kaposi’s Sarcoma, et cetera), of course, though they are largely ignored, if not swamped by those interested to bareback.

“Pa-ayaw-ayaw pa kunwari (Pretending to say no),” this one Guys4Men.com member posts, attacking one of those who advocates safer sex.  “Ipokrito (Hypocrite).”

No response.

So the invites continue.

And the barebacking.

“Just this once,” R. Reyes tells me, exasperation now obvious in his voice, his breathing berated.

“No.”

There, really, isn’t that many a way to say “No.”

So nothing happened.

Which was fine by me.

Because just because many prefer doing it, doesn’t mean I have to.