Bi Now, Gay Later?
Closer Look at Bisexuality in the Philippines
By M.D. dela Cruz Tan

SOCI-CULTURAL TAKE

At least Religioustolerance.org agrees, saying that “bisexual people are not necessarily attracted equally to both sexes.”  “Despite common misconceptions, bisexuality does not require that a person be attracted equally to both sexes.”

“Some bisexuals make a distinction between gender and sex.  Gender is defined in these situations as a social and psychological category, characterized by the common practices of men and women.  For example, the fact that women wear skirts and dresses in Western society while men traditionally do not, is a social gender issue. Sex in this case is defined as the biological difference between males and females, prior to any social conditioning.  Bisexuals in this sense may be attracted to more than one gender but only to one sex, e.g. a male bisexual may be attracted to aspects of men and masculinity, but not to the male body,” Wikipedia.org elaborates.

Internationally, bisexuality has made waves – though not often in a good light – because of the promotion of bisexual chic of the likes of Dave Navarro (more heterosexual, with his marriage to Carmen Electra) and Anne Heche (almost married to open lesbian Ellen Degeneres, then dumped her to mother a child for a heterosexual man).

The issue is more complex locally, where bisexual orientation is very common especially among adolescents, so much so “that many of the first sexual experiences of young men (especially those from the lower strata of the society) are with homosexuals – and this doesn’t lessen their masculinity,” Tristan M. observes, adding that “such actually increase their masculinity, as if proving how attractive they can be to both sexes.” 

Truly a segregation of sexual acts and gender identification, if ever there is one.

Particularly in the Philippines, there is, of course, the internally homophobic (homosexuals discriminating among members of the community) reaction to bisexuals of out homosexuals – though, of course, too, the reaction is reciprocated by self-identified bisexuals to homosexuals.  More specifically, out Filipinos “see bisexuals as confused with their gender identification, perhaps because they see more ‘normalcy’ in being bisexual, (as if saying) ‘Hey, I’m gay; but while that is unacceptable, I should still be okay since I’m only half-gay, as I still do it with women.’  It’s the ‘Bi Now, Gay Later’ saying in action,” Tristan M. says.  “Self-identified Filipino bisexuals, for their part, tend to look at the out homosexuals as too out – more effeminate than (the straight-acting, straight-looking homosexual) expression common (particularly in Western countries).”

This may be why, especially when compared to the lesbian, gay and transgender sectors of the LGBT community, bisexuals remain largely invisible as far as representation is concerned; yet, interestingly, very visible when attacks on their self-expression is the topic.

ALL WORDS

As the debates on its veracity continues, bisexuality is, in itself, evolving, as self-described bisexuals, or those curious about the expression, change with the times.  Already, there are the bi-curious, those who are open to homosexual experimentation; the heteroflexible (opposite is homoflexible), those who may be out homosexuals but will experiment with the opposite sex; passive bi or bi-permissive, those who are open to indirect bisexual contact; trisexual (coined by Robin Byrd), those who will “try anything once”; and omnisexual, those who are open to all kinds of sexual activities, including with intersex people, transgenders, and non-mainstream sexual activities like BDSM, fisting, et cetera.

When Tristan M. broke off the engagement with his girlfriend, it was because “I felt like I was cheating her.  The thing is, if I married her, I will continue looking for homosexual acts; but when once I was in a homosexual relationship, I didn’t look for a heterosexual woman sexual partner (even once),” he says, then, laughing, adds: “I guess I’ve always been more bent towards being a homosexual than a heterosexual, or even a bisexual.”

If only things were as simple as that, however.

So for now, bisexual is as bisexual goes.