Call for Help
GLBTQIAs and Suicide
By Mikee dela Cruz
PUBLISHED: MAY 2009

Signs of Suicidal Risk Severe changes in behavior, attitudes, and school performance. Giving away prized possessions. Putting oneself down for the smallest failure. Extremely upset and depressed over everyday happenings. Giving a verbal message that could be taken as a "good-bye,” e.g. “I just can't take it anymore.  Something's got to give.” Any action or way of behaving that seems unusual for the person, for example: driving recklessly; eating or drinking more or less than usual; a student with a good academic record quits studying.  Lee Ann Hoff outproud.org

Thirdly, it isn’t true that “people who talk about suicide won't commit suicide.   In fact, people who die by suicide almost always talk about suicide first, or give clues and warnings about their intention through their behavior, even though the clues may not be recognized at the time.”

Fourthly, it is also a myth that “people who threaten suicide cut their wrists, or don't succeed are just looking for attention and are not a risk for suicide.  The majority of people who succeed in killing themselves have a history of previous suicide attempts. All threats and attempts are ‘cries for help’ and should be taken seriously.  Failure to answer a cry for help may precipitate another attempt.  Anyone desperate enough to make a suicide attempt most surely needs more attention than he or she is currently receiving.”

And fifthly, it is false, too, that “talking about suicide to people who are upset will put the idea in their heads.  Suicide is much too complex a process to occur as a result of a sincere and caring person asking a question about suicidal intent.”

“Though a significant number of gay and lesbian youth commit suicide or make suicide attempts, they do so most often because of the prejudice, hatred, and sometimes violence they have endured from mainstream society.  Just like racial identity or being male or female, sexual orientation is not something a person chooses.  When societal attitudes toward gay males, lesbians, and bisexuals change from rejection to acceptance and support, their rates of self-destructive behavior most likely will decrease,” Hoff says.

Hoff adds: “Convey to the person that you understand (or are trying to understand) and care about the pain or other distress the person is going through. All you have to do is give the message of caring and concern and link that (suicidal) person with somebody who has more skill and experience.  In many instances, that may even be enough.”

Edwin E. hasn’t considered killing himself again – “I’m too occupied right now,” he smiles, adding how “now working as a counsellor has been helping me provide the support I didn’t get when it was I who needed them (in the past).  That, mostly, eat up my time.”

And it is in this – helping of suicide attempters – that Edwin E. believes he is “making some dent – I have been saved; for how long, I do not know for sure, though for now, I am saved,” he says.  “If I can do the same to others, with most choosing to (ignore them and their concerns), then the saving is all worth it.”

For more information, check out support groups in the GAYrectory.

SELECT REFERENCES

1. Wong, Doris Sue, and Hart, Jordana, "Answers Leave A Confounding Picture in Poll of Mass. High School Students," Boston Globe, May 20, 1994, p. 1.
2. Fisher, P., Shaffer, D, "Facts about Suicide: A Review of National Mortality Statistics and Records," in Planning to Live: Suicidal Youth in Community Settings, ed. Rotheram-Borus, M.J., Bradley, J., Obolensky, N., Tulsa, Oklahoma, University of Oklahoma Press, 1990, pp. 1-33.
3. Shaffer, d., Garland, A., Gould, M., Fisher, P., Trautman, P., "Preventing Teenage Suicide: A Critical Review," Journal of the American Academy of Child Psychiatry, 1988; 27 (6), pp. 675-687.
4. Spoonhour, A., "The First Few Days are the Hardest," in People, Feb. 18, 1985, pp. 76-78.
5. U. S. Department of Health and Human Services, "Gay Male and Lesbian Youth Suicide," by Paul Gibson, in Report of the Secretary's Task Force on Youth Suicide, ed. Marcia R. Feinleib, Washington, DC, January 1989.
6. Quoted in Bull, Chris, "Suicidal Tendencies," The Advocate, April 5, 1994, p. 37.
7. Gary Remafedi, quoted in Bull, Chris, "Suicidal Tendencies," The Advocate, April 5, 1994, p. 38.
8. Remafedi, G., Farrow, J., and Deisher, R. (1991), "Risk Factors for Attempted Suicide in Gay and Bisexual Youth," Pediatrics, 87(6), pp. 869-76.
9. Remafedi, G., "Male Homosexuality: The Adolescent's Perspective," Adolescent Health Program, University of Minnesota: Unpublished, 1985.
10. Pollak, Michael, "Male Homosexuality" in Western Sexuality, eds. Phillippe Aries and Andre Bejin, NY: Blackwell, 1985.
11. Joyce Hunter, quoted in Bull, Chris, "Suicidal Tendencies, The Advocate, April 5, 1994, p. 42.
12. Bell, A., and Weinberg, M., Homosexualities: A Study of Diversity among Men and Women, New York: Simon and Schuster, 1978.
13. Harry, J., "Adolescent Suicide and Sexual Identity Issues," submitted to the National Institute of Mental Health for the Secretary's Conference on Adolescent Suicide, Washington, DC, May 8-9, 1986.
14. Huxdly, J., and Brandon, S., "Partnership in Transsexualism, Part 1: Paired and Non-paired Groups," Archives of Sexual Behavior, 10, pp. 133-141, 1981.
15. Gerald Newberry, quoted in "Jack and Jack and Jill and Jill," by Richard Lacayo, Time, Dec. 14, 1992, pp. 52-53.
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18. Beth Winship, quoted in Blumenfeld, Warren J (ed.)., Homophobia: How We All Pay the Price, Boston: Beacon Press, 1992, back cover.
19. Sharon Bergman, Testimony, Governor's Commission on Gay and Lesbian Youth, Boston.
20. Bobby Griffith, quoted in Miller, B. Jaye, "From Silence to Suicide: Measuring a Mother's Loss," in Blumenfeld, Warren J. (ed.). Homophobia: How We All Pay the Price, Boston: Beacon Press, 1992, pp. 88-89.
21. Mary Griffith, Testimony, Los Angeles School Committee, Public Hearings, June 23, 1988.
22. JoAnne Cardell, Testimony, Governor's Commission on Gay and Lesbian Youth, Boston.
23. Testimony, Governor's Commission on Gay and Lesbian Youth, Massachusetts State House, Boston, November 1992.